INFJ Confession 1464) I have recently found out that I am apart of the rarest personality type of our population, the INFJ. While researching this personality type, I couldn't help but be amazed at how much the descriptions and forfums described who I am. I have a very hard time trusting ANYONE, and have an uncanny nack for seeing the REAL side of a person or situation before I really know all of the "facts". It is very hard to find someone who truly understands what goes on in my head; it is maddness at times.
INFJ Confession 1461) I don't feel worthy of being a special person. I don't do anything. I'm not useful enough to help anyone. I cannot trust any of the people I know with anything I feel and I feel guilty for this loneliness... I hate myself for this constant unhappiness. I'm sorry for writing this. I hope nobody gets sad or angry or anything.
"Anonymous asked: Any INFJ's out there with an ESFJ parent?" Yes. But it's way better than that one INFJ on here who has an *ISTJ* parent. At least there's always a possibility that my mom would still actually listen to me and consider my point of view on things. We just find it hard to explain things, y'know?
INFJ Confession 1457) I must come off as 'cute' or 'innocent' or something because when people want to calm me down they always seem to pat me on the head or knee. It makes me incredibly angry. I'm an adult woman, not a child. Being patted like a puppy just feels degrading.
INFJ Confession 1455) You guys probably don't care, but I just need to tell someone. So, I've spent the last couple days with two of my friends, (who are strong extraverts), and I really need some time to recover, but they don't understand that and keep wanting to do things with me. I don't want to upset them by saying I just want to be alone, so I keep giving in.
INFJ Confession 1454) My mom is an ISTJ, and she's the most judgmental, criticizing, irritable, unforgiving, loud-mouthed, and impatient person I've ever had to deal with in my life thus far, and she's someone I consciously strive NOT to be like.
In response to INFJ Confession 1445 (simply because this wouldn't fit in a reply): Two of my few best friends are INFJs. It's hard to believe we found each other, but it makes sense that we were drawn to each other. Sometimes when I spend time with them conversation does die down ,but as INFJs, spending time socializing usually drains our energy-not so after spending time with them. They are the best confidants, and I always feel like we're on the same page. Seriously beautiful friendships
INFJ Confession 1452) People don't seem to realize that the world has so many people in it that a few hundred or even thousand people typing as INFJ is still a teeny tiny percent of the world population. Mis-typings or no, it's a small percent either way. Look at the big picture. (:
INFJ Confession 1450) I don't understand why people think just because I can enjoy a party I "can't be an introvert". I'm extremely introverted- need lots of quiet time to recoup and get overwhelmed by stimuli easily- but if my friends will be there and plan for it carefully then I can learn to enjoy clubs/parties/bars just as much as my extroverted friends. I just can't do it as often or for as long as them. It's good to stretch those hidden, unused extrovert muscles one in a while. It helps you grow as a person.
INFJ Confession 1445) I often daydream of finding another INFJ in my life and becoming perfect friends and never being sad again, but I kinda think that if I were actually to meet another INFJ, we would talk for a while, enjoy it, but then get bored pretty quickly and agree to each go back to our quiet martyrdoms among people that can't possibly understand us, whom we desperately want to help and to solve...
INFJ Confession 1444) When it comes to religion I'm always pulled constantly in both directions. My hearts and intuition tells me that there is a greater purpose and a reason for everything and that it just makes sense that there is a God, but my logical side can't help but feel like that's just my idealism taking over and believing what I wish to be true, rather than what reason would tell me is true. I just can't see anyway to compromise or solve this problem and it keeps me up at night.
INFJ Confession 1443) It's at the point where I'm so tired of feeling isolated as an INFJ that I am debating whether or not to break my previous morals and live a bit more on the wild side when people show interest in me. It's not that I don't value myself, it's that I believe I deserve to treat myself once in awhile.
INFJ Confession 1441) I have a sneaking suspicion that some, if not most of the INFJs on the internet are actually moody teenagers whose brain chemistry isn't fully-formed to get an accurate MBTI test result, leading to a population explosion of our rare type. Not that there's anything wrong with being moody or a teenager -- it's just that that doesn't mean you're an INFJ. Plus it might close you off from truly discovering your personality later on.
INFJ Confession 1440) I truly feel so alone sometimes but it's become a part of me. I like being alone but at the same time I hate it. I find it hard to do things with other people, I get things done a lot faster and more efficiently without people to distract me. However it's not like I don't want to be around people, but it's because of this that a lot of people think I'm a bitch. I don't know how to change that it's really frustrating to have to either act fake or just accept that I will always be alone.
INFJ Confession 1439) My friend told me that he was going on a bike ride with a girl he described as "cool" and "awesome." I know that I can't expect us to be anything more than friends, so why am I jealous that he's riding his motorbike around with another girl? Why in the world am I becoming attached to this douchebag, when I know he's not interested enough to be in a serious relationship with me (and he expressed that clearly)? I hate being on the losing end with detached guys who are afraid of emotionality. :/
I hardly ever cry. If & when I do cry,it’s for a fleeting instant & it’s because I’ve seen something so awe-inspiring or beautiful that it overwhelms me & I cry. I would cry a ton as a child,but I think I’ve just felt so deeply in every facet of my life that it takes something really amazing to truly overwhelm me & make those tears come down.People may think I’m unfeeling,but that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Tears are the release of overwhelming emotion, & I’ve just learned to cope.
INFJ Confession 1430) made me almost choke on my breakfast. I've always seen myself as a caged bird, I still collect birdcages! I see birds as souls trapped on this earth. I feel such a strong connection to them and once I saw a caged bird picking it's own feathers because it was so neurotic, it was shaking and I saw the panic in it's eyes... Feels just like it was my soul in there, you know.
INFJ Confession 1436) I don't know if this is a INFJ thing or it's just me, but when I can sense that something's wrong with someone I know but I can't sense what the problem is or who specifically has it, it drives me insane. It's not for the gossip or anything like that, I'm just genuinely upset that someone's going through something and it affects me physically. I can't sleep, get nauseous, and get headaches. Does that happen to anyone else?
INFJ Confession 1435) You'll figure out precisely what you lost-- by lying for nearly two years and then being honest about your past--when it's far too late. I would have given nearly everything for you. I can't trust you, and that still hurts, even after these months. Sometimes I wish I could go back.
INFJ Confession 1434) I've liked him for almost 6 years now -- pathetic, right? I'm 19 and I need to move on. However, I consider him to be one of my best friends. We have had awesome times. Now, he goes to a college far from home. Summer comes, and now, while home, he comes and goes whenever he's free. I find it so flighty compared to before, though I know he can't talk to me while he's home (dunno why). I worry that I'll never see him in person again. What do I do? Faint hope comes and goes. It's a roller coaster.
INFJ Confession 1433) When other people are uncomfortable in a room I always feel the need to mediate the issue, even if it doesn't involve me. I can't stand unsettled environments but I feel so uncomfortable in these situations that I just have to do something. usually the air clears a little bit, but I kind of hate that I find myself doing this a lot. this happens mostly with my ISFJ friend.
INFJ Confession 1432) I look at the guys in my hometown and just around me and I feel I'm destined for someone more than them. I feel like I'm meant for a fantasy love like one from a movie. I'm not saying I'm better than those normal buys, but is it too much to ask for a movie love story?
INFJ Confession 1431) Before we met and for a while afterwards, my wife took bellydance lessons as a hobby. Some years back when she was in better health, when we had better sex lives and when we were getting along better generally, she used to dance for me sometimes. It meant a lot to me and I really miss it.
HSPs are easily overwhelmed by stimuli, get stressed by loud noises and strong smells, are extremely perceptive, have rich and often intense internal lives, and need plenty of quiet and down time to maintain their equilibrium (and sanity, I would personally add).
1) Get enough sleep
Lack of sleep (less than 7 hours, for most people) is well known to produce irritability, moodiness, and decreased concentration and productivity in the average person. Given our already ramped-up senses, I’m convinced that lack of sleep can make a highly sensitive life almost unbearable. Getting enough sleep soothes your senses and will help you cope with an already overwhelming world.
2) Eat healthy foods regularly throughout the day
Aron points out that extreme hunger can be disruptive to an HSP’s mood or concentration. Keep your edgy nerves happy by maintaining a steady blood sugar level through regular healthy well-balanced meals and snacks. I also take fish oil (omega-3) supplements daily as the brain loves these, lots of studies support their beneficial cognitive and emotional effects.
3) Wear noise-reducing headphones
A boyfriend introduced Peltor ear protecting headphones (usually used by construction workers, not pre-med students) to me when I was 19 and studying for exams. No matter where I am in the world I have had a pair with me ever since. HSPs are highly sensitive to noise, especially the kind we can’t control, and my beloved headphones give me control over my personal peace in what’s all too often a noisy intrusive world.
4) Plan in decompression time
HSPs don’t do well with an overly packed schedule or too much time in noisy, crowded or high pressure environments. If you know you’re going to spend a few hours in a challenging environment - such as a concert, a parade, or a crowded mall at Christmas time - know that you’re likely to be frazzled after and will need to decompress somewhere quiet and relaxing, on your own if possible.
5) Have at least one quiet room or space to retreat to in your home
If you live with others, create a quiet safe place you can retreat to when you need to get away from people and noise. This could be a bedroom, a study, or even just a candlelit bath (or shower if that’s all you have!). I’ve found it often helps to listen to quiet relaxing music as well, this can even drown out more jarring external noise when you need it to.
6) Give yourself time and space to get things done
I mentioned above that HSPs don’t do well with a packed schedule. I’ve managed to structure my work life so that I work afternoon/evening shifts the days I’m at the medical clinic. This way I’m able to get out of bed without an alarm, eat a calm unrushed breakfast and putter around before getting down to business. The calm this gives me carries through my whole day. Another strategy for those who work in the morning might be getting up extra early (after 8 hours sleep, of course) to enjoy the quiet before the rest of the household wakes up.
7) Limit caffeine
HSPs are sensitive to caffeine - I usually can’t even handle the traces of caffeine found in decaf coffee. If you’re a coffee drinker (or dark chocolate junkie) and identify with the HSP trait description, giving up the joe might be a big step towards feeling more collected and calm.
8) Keep the lights down low
I’ve never liked bright lights and learning about HSP helped me understand why. Minimizing light stimulation goes a long way: I only put on low lights in the evening, and prefer to shop in certain local grocery stores which have gentle mood lighting, avoiding the garishly lit, crowded “big box” stores whenever I can.
9) Get things done in off hours
To avoid crowds and the associated noise and stimulation, I’ve learned to live my life outside of the average person’s schedule. I grocery shop late in the evenings, run errands during the week whenever I can, go to movies on weeknights, and go out for my walks before the rest of the world hits the jogging path. An added bonus: by avoiding the crowds I usually get things done faster , and almost always get a parking spot!
10) Surround yourself with beauty and nature
Since we HSPs are so sensitive and deeply affected by our surroundings, envelop yourself with beauty and calm whenever possible. I’ve decorated my home simply in a way that’s very pleasing to my eye, with minimal clutter and chaos. I also spend as much time as I can walking in nature, enjoying the quiet and its naturally healing and calming beauty.
Speaking of HSPs, a very beautifully written guide on how to be an HSP in a non-HSP world. Love it! I need to write these on my bathroom mirror or something.
INFJ Confession 1427) I sometimes feel so detached from my body, and I never know if I'm just really weird or other people feel that way too. Sometimes I look in the mirror or look down at my hand or feet and honestly get freaked out because I don't know who I am or where I am. I feel trapped.
To the person who wrote confession 1424: I am completely right there with you and it was only until very recently that I even realized I was doing it. I came home from college for summer break and had like, 4 mental breakdowns because I wasn't letting myself feel everything. It makes me wonder what i've missed the entire time I was blocking things. I feel much better now, and I hope you can feel alive again soon =]
To the infj that wrote confession 1425, I was just thinking about that yesterday! I'm the same way. I was always the 'good/favorite child' according to my siblings, but that's only because I knew how to talk to my parents and get out of punishments.
INFJ Confession 1425) I have an awful cynical side. It hardly comes out, because I'm a caring person. But when it does, I can be mean. I know intuitively what bothers people, and I notice quirks about other people that others don't. If I wanted to hurt them, by god I can. But I feel horrible after.
INFJ Confession 1424) I realized today that I've been walling off my more intense emotions for the past few years to more easily function with other people "in the now." This isn't how I want to live my life. I want to feel alive again.
INFJ Confession 1423) I was thinking that I'd grow my hair long as well as grow out my bangs because it symbolizes the exact opposite of my personality. I read somewhere online that short hair projects confidence, and bangs attracts attention to your eyes. My eyes of course have that general INFJ look but can look quite sarcastic (so does the quality of my voice, haha). People tend to think I'm intimidating or unapproachable or whatever. I want to hide myself, but I'd still move the same way. Looks can be deceiving.